December 18, 2010

November 12, 2010

Friday WTF!!?

He should really form an act with that Russian guy...

I believe this is from Strangers With Candy... I want the boxed set.

September 16, 2010

Versatile blogger, moi?

Bernard S. Jansen, who somehow finds the time and energy to have two blogs (that I know of), has given me a kick in the creative bum by handing me this very fine award. Rather than waste time thanking [insert name of deity] and The Academy, I’ll get down to it.

It works like this, apparently:
The Rules for The Versatile Blogger Award:

  1. Thank and link back to the person that gave you the award.
  2. Share seven things about yourself.
  3. Pass the award to fifteen bloggers that you think deserve it.
  4. Lastly, contact all of the bloggers that you’ve picked for the award.

Okay, I’ve thanked Bernard, and linked back to both his blogs.

Here are seven things about me you will be no better off for knowing:

  1. I have no children and three grandchildren.
  2. Like Bernard, I have never broken a bone, or one of anyone else’s (as far as I know).
  3. I spent several years co-writing an Aussie sit-com called Hey, Dad! At the time, it was one of the longest-running TV shows in the world, after eight years on air.
  4. I wrote my first short story at nine. It was set in a doomed submarine, and everyone died. My teacher was quite impressed, but concerned…
  5. I believe in love at first sight. Fortunately it hasn’t happened since I met my wife.
  6. I have two dogs and a cat. Their combined ages are 42.
  7. I was about to delete this blog and start again (maybe). And I don’t Twitter.

Like Bernard, I’m going with ten blogs for the moment – my dwindling attention span makes even thinking up those a Herculean task.

  1. John Walkenbach, the first blogger I ever discovered.
  2. Mick Farren, a genuine rock star.
  3. Brad Green, who blogs even less than I do.
  4. Teresa Cortez, barer of souls.
  5. Alexandra Sokoloff, who enlightens.
  6. Robin Evans, fellow trail boss at Critters Bar.
  7. Gavin Broom, who has morphed into an entertaining movie critic.
  8. Sophie Playle, whose star is on the rise.
  9. ABSOLUTELY*KATE, who has hopefully forgiven me for wandering off again…
  10. Cate Gardner, who doesn’t need this.

Okay, that wasn’t so hard. I know it’ll take days for lazy me to contact all those people, at least one of whom has never heard of me. Still, that’s the internet, isn’t it?

Thanks again, Bernard. 

August 10, 2010

Brett Easton Ellis and Warren Zevon

I’m listening, right now, to a one-hour informal interview with Brett Easton Ellis (who prefers “Brett Ellis” – he added in his middle name because it sounded more literary…) Anyway, this show asks its subjects, who come from all walks of professional and artistic life, to choose five favourite pieces of music and talk about them. Ellis’ first choice was Desperados Under The Eaves by Warren Zevon. He added that he would probably pick five different pieces on any other day, but after it was played he was glad he’d picked it and would have anyway.

I nearly stood up and applauded when I heard the lines,

And if California slides into the ocean
Like the mystics and statistics say it will
I predict this motel will be standing until I pay my bill

…just like I did the first time I ever heard them.

August 01, 2010

Take it from one who knew

"Behind the ostensible government sits enthroned an invisible
government owing no allegiance and acknowledging no responsibility to the people. To destroy this invisible government, to befoul this unholy alliance between corrupt business and corrupt politics is the first task of statesmanship."

(President Theodore Roosevelt)

July 16, 2010

Foul Language Friday

Trying to kick-start your blog by posting a YouTube video is pretty pathetic, but posting one that's had over three and a quarter million views is just desperately sad.

Unless it's this one.

Definitely Not Safe For Work, unless you just got sacked, or you're the boss, or you just want to get a message across...

March 23, 2010

Lonely days are gone, I'm a-goin' home...

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Alex Chilton died. Never got a mention in the "mainstream" media, of course.

"High Priest" was my favourite album. I had to listen on my own, my friends couldn't stand it.

And while we're riffing on Alex's memory, spare a thought for Lux Interior of The Cramps, who also passed away recently. A month ago. Maybe I should subscribe to Rolling Stone...

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March 02, 2010

Music is the International Language...

Forgetting the words (or your meds) need be an embarrassment no more...

Found on Some Guy's Blog, and then some. Nearly half a million hits...

If this doesn't make you smile, you're taking things far too seriously.

February 27, 2010

Apocryphal Hollywood Story About Motivation

The story goes that, some time in the seventies, when The Method was becoming de rigeur in Hollywood, a Famous Director was encountering some problems with a Famous Method Actor on the set of an action film. The scene takes place on a rooftop. The Famous Method Actor has to run from one side of the roof to the other, as fast as he can. That’s all.

He tries, and falters. This happens over and over. He just can’t get the “urgency” thing happening. He goes to his trailer, meditates, and returns. Still no good. He’s trying his best, he’s almost in tears but he just can’t run “right”. Money and daylight are burning away. Famous Director is getting the shits, big time. Tired of the mucking around, he yells “What is it, what’s the problem?”

“I just can’t find the reason for him to be doing this,” replies the Famous Method Actor across the rooftop. “I mean, what’s my motivation?”

The Famous Director sits down, lights cigarette, looks at the Famous Method Actor for a moment and says…

“I’ll tell you when you get here!”

February 14, 2010

The least you can do is better than nothing.

100 Stories For Haiti is available for pre-order now!

 You can pre-order a copy of this book here. All proceeds go to the International Red Cross

I’m pleased to be able to say I had a story, "Voice in the Night", accepted for this very special book.

From the new website:

100 Stories for Haiti is a unique collection of stories bound together by paper and glue and massive amounts of hope.

The book is the brainchild of author Greg McQueen. On the morning of January 19, Greg posted a video on his blog saying:

Dear Twitterverse, I can't keep watching this on the news or trending on Twitter without doing something. I woke up this morning with the idea that together we could make a book and donate profits to help relief efforts in Haiti.

Within hours, news spread throughout microblogging website, Twitter, and story submissions began arriving. Nick Harkaway, author of 'The Gone Away World', contributed a short story for the collection and penned the book's introduction. By the submission deadline a week later, the project had received over 400 submissions -- whittled down to one hundred during the following week, and the full 80,000 word manuscript was edited and assembled within two weeks of Greg's first announcement.

This extraordinary anthology is released as an ebook and paperback on March 4th, 2010.

What we need now is for a hell of a lot of people to buy at least one copy. I'm planning to give at least one copy away on the writers' group Critters Bar as a flash prize (you'll have to join to have a winning chance...) So, if any of the six people who sometimes read this blog could spread the word, we might eventually prove just how mighty the pen can be.

January 24, 2010

100 Stories Needed to Help Haiti

From The Press Dispensary:

January 20, 2010 - Press Dispensary - Fundraisers are calling for urgent short story submissions to help raise money for disaster-stricken Haiti. Out of the submissions, 100 pieces of fiction will be chosen to appear in an e-book, the proceeds of which will go to the Red Cross.

The Red Cross is just one of a number of charities and humanitarian organisations mobilising a vast aid effort to reach the thousands of injured, hungry and thirsty survivors of the 7.0-magnitude earthquake to hit Haiti on 12 January.

100 Stories for Haiti is the brainchild of author Greg McQueen. On the morning of January 19, Greg posted a video on his blog saying: “Dear Twitterverse, I can't keep watching this on the news or trending on Twitter without doing something. I woke up this morning with the idea that together we could make an e-book and donate all the profits to the Red Cross.”

Within hours, news had spread throughout microblogging website, Twitter, and story submissions began arriving. Nick Harkaway, author of ‘The Gone Away World’, will be editing a story for the book as well as penning the introduction. Lorraine Mace, co-author of the ABC Checklist for Writers, and award-winning environmental journalist, Sarah Lewis-Hammond, are volunteering their time to help with the editorial process.

100 Stories for Haiti needs short story submissions and volunteers.

If you want to send a short story, please follow these guidelines:
• Do not exceed 1,000 words.
• No stories containing graphic violence, death or destruction.
• Send all stories in the body text of an email to . Stories sent as attachments will not be opened.
• Stories must be received by Monday 25 January, 2010.


Greg McQueen is a UK author living in Aarhus, Denmark with his wife and three year old daughter. He writes mostly for teens and is the son of Geoff McQueen, creator of ‘The Bill’.

Greg's video can be found here

Story submissions and volunteers email:

The book will be sold on Founder and CEO Mark Coker will be waiving the normal 15% commission.

100 Stories for Haiti will be published in mid-February, 2010.

For further information, please contact:
Greg McQueen, 100 stories for Haiti
Tel: +45 31 71 77 41